Hi, my name is Lynda and I am 53 years old. I have a son, Justin, who is now 18 and doing very well indeed. He was my introduction to postnatal depression. This is a short story of how I coped and turned around the outcome.
So here goes. I had a very complicated pregnancy. I spent most of my time hospitalised. My husband and I even got married in the hospital chapel. At 26 weeks, Justin decided he was ready to be born and I went into premature labour. Then I was taken to acute care and put on a drip to stop contractions. After 5 days Justin still wanted out so he was born by emergency C section at 27 weeks. My husband got to see Justin before he was ventilated and taken to neonatal intensive care. Justin fitted into Jeff’s hand, he was that small.
Justin was a very small and fragile package. I was not allowed to touch him because he was so sick, all I could do was look at him through this plastic box and wonder if he would live or die. I prepared myself for the latter. So when he did live and finally came home I was at a loss. What do I do now. I had to turn around my whole way of thinking.
I disliked being a mother. Justin was very demanding, he was the hardest boss I had ever worked for in my life. 24/7. I felt lost, sad, depressed and I decided to take myself to a doctor where I was diagnosed with postnatal depression and placed on medication.
I had never celebrated the birth of my son, nor gave myself time to be happy.
As Justin grew his development skills did not. Doctors said he was developmentally delayed. What is that supposed to mean. Anyway, I decided to get help with physiotherapy and occupational therapy amongst other things. When Justin was 12 months old the “experts” confirmed Justin had cerebral palsy. I knew something was not right. I was told he would never walk, talk or do anything. Well, I got Justin walking, talking etc.
In amongst the crying and despair, I started to grow. I realised that I was the one who knew I was depressed. I was the one who knew there was something wrong with the development of my own child. I was the one who woke up every day and breathed. The light at the end of the tunnel was ME.
The symptoms of postnatal depression are many and varied, so I have listed below a few, but in the end, you will be the one who knows.
- Difficulty falling asleep
- Early morning waking, unable to get back to sleep
- Palpitations
- Panicky feelings, panic attacks
- Feeling like you are putting on a front, forcing yourself to do things when all you want to do is sleep
- Feeling of overwhelming exhaustion like you have gone past the point where a good nights sleep would make you feel better
- Exhaustion following the birth which has developed into extreme fatigue rather than resolving itself with a few weeks following delivery
- Bouts of weeping over things which would not normally provoke such a reaction
Short tempered, snappy behaviour - Desperation for rest, feeling trapped and unable to find a moment to relax
- Headache, night sweats, bleary vision
http://www.raisingchildren.net.au/
http://www.reachout.com.au/default.asp?ti=1908
http://www.beyondblue.org.au/index.aspx?link_id=94
No comments:
Post a Comment